The Last Night Mystery
by WeBuiltThePyramids
Summary: Sheldon and Amy wake up in Sheldon's bed with no memory of the night before.


**I don't know who came up with this first, but someone at Fanforum (go there again, Joni!) suggested this, and well, it took a while, but of course I had to write it!**

**I don't own anything.**

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><p><em>"Let's give them something to talk about." - Bonnie Raitt<em>

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><p>Sheldon opened his eyes and yawned, squinting at the sun in his eyes. He'd slept in, and he felt <em>awful.<em> And this sun wasn't making it any better…Sheldon shifted his weight and found himself falling, hitting the floor of his bedroom with a thud that sounded so, so very loud.

_What the Aquaman…_Sheldon pulled himself to a sitting position and rubbed his head, looking up at his bed. He never fell out of bed, it was the perfect size for one person…

Sheldon's eyes grew wide when he saw the covers move and a brunette head lift up from the pillow. "Sheldon?"

"Amy?"

In a flash Amy was sitting up, looking at him in what he certainly hoped was horror. "Why am I in your bed?"

Sheldon stared at her. "_You're_ asking _me_ why you're hogging my space?"

"I'm asking you what we _did_." Amy said.

"You don't remember?"

She shook her head. "No, I don't, unfortunately. I'd want to remember every detail of any lovin' I happen to get. For research purposes, and well, just because, you know."

Sheldon didn't think he'd blinked this entire time, which was strangely odd for him. He was quite the regular blinker. "Did we…" he trailed off. "Are you wearing pajama bottoms?"

Amy put her hand to her forehead. "My leopard spotted Victoria's Secret panties, yes. You?"

"Superman briefs," Sheldon admitted. "Amy Farrah Fowler," he asked her, "why are we pantsless?"

"I'm not sure," Amy said. "Perhaps last night we made some scientific discovery about the uselessness of pants?"

"You mean like what, they're the clothing equivalent of an appendix?" Sheldon asked. "I am quite fond of pants."

"I'm sure some are quite fond of their appendixes," Amy said.

"But why were we in bed together?" Sheldon asked.

"I don't know," Amy said, "maybe we were practicing co-sleeping. It's quite beneficial for parents and children, you know."

"We are not in a parent – child relationship," Sheldon said. "What else?"

"Why are you asking all the questions?" Amy asked. "Aren't you supposed to be the one unraveling all of the mysteries?"

"Ugh," Sheldon said, squeezing his eyes shut, "don't talk so loud."

"Sorry," Amy said, looking toward the door. "What the heck happened last night?"

Sheldon shook his head. "I don't know, but I'm going to find out."

Amy rubbed her temples. "How?"

"Amy, I am, as you say, the one who asks questions. It's…what I do. So I'm off to do just that."

"Wait," Amy said, throwing the covers off. "Wait for me."

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><p>Amy and Sheldon located their skirt and pants, folded on a chair near the door. "Folded," Sheldon said. "So clearly whatever we came up with last night has nothing to do with a newfound dislike of pants." He opened the door to his bedroom and held it for Amy, keeping his hand over his eyes. It really was too bright.<p>

"I think you're hangover, Sheldon," Amy told him as she walked by.

"And you're not?"

"Oh, I am-I _know_ I am. I'm just thinking you are."

"Stop talking," Sheldon said. "My head hurts." He closed his eyes, reaching an arm out so his fingertips barely touched Amy's back for guidance as they moved down the hall.

"Well, well, well, there's our rock stars!" Penny said cheerfully upon the Homo novus' entrance to the main area of 4A.

Sheldon opened his eyes. Penny, a groggy looking Raj, and Howard were on the couch, Leonard in his chair, Bernadette in the wooden chair at the far end of the couch, near Howard. "What's everyone doing here?"

"We wanted to see how you two came out of it," Leonard said with a grin.

"Penny, you're in my spot."

"Came out of it?" Amy asked.

"Try to make me move and I'll talk loud, Hangover," Penny said smugly.

"Of course," Bernadette said, ignoring Penny and speaking directly to those in the room taking advantage of being bipedal. "I'm sure you both feel different…although Amy's been like this before."

"It's still my spot."

Amy visibly paled. "Sheldon," she said, turning to him. "Sheldon we…"

Leonard glanced at Penny, and she smirked.

"We what?" Sheldon said, looking at the smug group and then back to Amy. "No." He shook his head.

"Oh my God, we had sex!" Amy said, looking half horrified and half pleased.

"How could we?" Sheldon asked. "I feel different, yes, but that's the…whatever this headache is! And you haven't had sexual intercourse before, have you?"

"Not with a man," Amy said, "but there is Gerard."

Sheldon did a double take. "Who's Gerard?"

"An electric toothbrush," Penny offered.

Leonard and Raj gagged.

"We had sex, Sheldon," Amy said. "It's the only thing that can explain this."

"No," Sheldon said again. "That's…that's not true. That's _impossible!_" He spun and moved down the hall, holding his hands out in front of him.

"Star Wars reference!" Penny said proudly.

Amy looked at her. "Bestie," she said. "Sheldon and I…"

"What do you think?" Penny asked. "Do your remember?"

Amy paused for a moment. "You convinced us to drink…you convinced me to drink, and I gave him sone and…" she shook her head. "Nothing else." She turned her head. "Cuddles?"

"Don't call me that!" came a shout from the other room, and Amy cringed at the noise. "I'll be back," she said to the rest of the gang.

"Sheldon," Amy said, re-entering his room. The theoretical physicist was grabbing clothes out of his closet. "What are you doing?"

"I have to shower," Sheldon said. "I have to take multiple long showers?"

"Do I repulse you?" she asked.

"Amy," Sheldon said, "coitus with another human being is messy. I have to shower!"

"Oh God," Amy said, pacing in small circles while still holding her temples. "Don't talk so loud!"

"How can I not?" Sheldon asked. "We both violated the relationship agreement. We disgraced ourselves and went against everything we stand for."

"Everything you stand for."

"And now we've had coitus and _oh God I have to shower!"_ Sheldonflung his bedroom door opened and raced down the hall.

Amy sat on the edge of the bed. What did this make them? Was everything going to be awkward? Would they just have to do it again?

Amy decided not. They were Sheldon and Amy, not a soap opera couple. Once Sheldon got clean, they'd be just fine. They wouldn't keep wondering about this at all.

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><p>"Did you see the looks on their faces?" Howard said, laughing quietly into his hands.<p>

"I know!" Leonard said. "And we didn't even lie!"

Raj leaned over and whispered in Howard's ear. "Oh, sorry Raj," Bernadette said. "This all went down after you passed out. Amy got Sheldon drunk and they sang on the Karaoke machine. Then they…"

"Animal, by Neon Trees," Howard said upon Raj's next whispered question.

"Anyway," Penny continued, "we gave them water to keep them hydrated so this hangover thing wouldn't happen, but they spilled it on their laps."

"So since Sheldon just goes to bed without pajama bottoms when he spills something," Leonard said, "we just put them to bed that way."

"And in the same bed so in the morning we could watch them freak out," Howard finished. "We didn't lie to them!" he protested when Raj whispered again.

"No, we called them rock stars when they sang for us last night, and Amy's been hung over before." Penny counted on her fingers and then dropped her hands to her lap. "We just get to have fun with this until they figure it out."

"I have a question," Bernadette said, "how are they going to figure it out?"

"Eh, we'll tell them," Leonard said, glancing at Penny again and grinning. "As soon as it stops being fun."

Bernadette nodded. "So, never."

"Never, ever say never," Leonard said.

"Are you quoting Justin Bieber?" Bernadette asked, looking revolted.

"No," Penny said. "Ms. Frizzle said it first."

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><p><strong>Hope you liked it! :)<strong>


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